What's not to like about retirement?

I was just contemplating today about retirement.  What do I like about it?  Retirement how do I love thee?  Let me count the ways.

A) I can work at my own pace, I write now and I write and write.  I love it.  Nothing about my writing is 'time sensitive' so no real deadlines, no boss chomping at the bit for paperwork for the state and federal government.  Yeah!

B) I can pee whenever I want to.  Now this may not sound like such a big deal for some, but when you've got clients in your office and you have to pee oh so badly, believe me, it is a big deal.

C)  I can sleep in the morning as long as I please.  Need I say more?  Seriously, this needs no explanation.

D) I can get up at three in the morning, write when it's quiet and go back to bed and sleep in.  See above.

E) I can get a haircut and shop whenever I feel like it.  Really, I never knew that Mondays in the grocery store could be so quiet, unlike weekends when it's packed and people pushing and shoving.  OK  I apologized for pushing and shoving.   Now, Mondays, I don't have to.

F) I can visit the parks and lakes near me whenever I want.  Beats the hell out of a bitchy boss and a slacker assistant any day.

G) I can text and talk on the phone whenever and as long as I like.  This one needs little explanation either.

When some people say they miss working, well try gardening, painting furniture, writing, reading or sewing or something as a hobby you've never had time to do before.  Try it, you'll like it.

If it isn't fashion, the blog's not 'in'

This is the Real world

I write on our book blog often, but this is my personal blog site where I write about real life and personal things.  I know the 'fashion' blogs are all the rage right now, but fashion is just smoke and mirrors.  I cringe at when I was a teen and had to have the most fashionable designs, or as close to them as I could afford.

As I grew older, this thing we hate set in, it is called reality.  I've been wondering why we hate it or more to the point, why we tend to fear reality so much.  Many people turn to distractions to pretend reality doesn't exist, yet, no matter the distractions, when we return from them, reality never goes away.

Some people turn to addictions, not just substance abuse addictions always either.  Gaming and technology in general can be a powerful addiction for too many.  Technology is a good tool, if used right.  But technology is responsible for marriage and relationship destruction, for loss of jobs, for loss of money and even for loss of one's home because too much money was spent on buying 'things' from web sites.  All addictions, all needing to be dealt with.

Distractions, like buying expensive fashion items. We seem to think 'things' will make us happy, fulfill us when relationships turn bad, when we feel lost and need a 'thing' fix.  But that's just what is is, a buying spree fix, only good until the next 'high' is needed. Technology, can destroy lives as much as drugs and/or alcohol can.

Can we tell this to kids, young adults or older adults and they get it?  Probably not, unfortunately.

I have watched America's Next Top Model and while amusing, it is also sad.  This show gets entirely too much media attention.  They have one 'media' guy on there, whom I cannot stand because I highly doubt This guy knows what anyone needs to wear or buy.  Just a spokesman, like a carnival barker for 'buy me, buy me, buy me' nothing more than a selling tool.  Then they invited a popular blogger to visit, a guy who has no sense of anything that looks good, but because he is brash on his blog site and rude to people about what they choose to wear, he is 'popular' Lord help us! Like Joan Rivers and her fashion police act, which, folks is just that, an act.  I watched Joan as a kid, she is older than dirt and so many face lifts, her face looks like stone.

Well this ends this chat session and I doubt anyone particularly cares because my site has no boobs, bare asses or high fashion to it.  More's the pity. 

 

Boys and playing with dolls

I remember an 'incident' with my now ex-husband, when my oldest son was playing 'tea party' with his sister and feeding her dolls with a bottle.  The (stupid man ex) barged in and had a fit, trying to tell me that 'boys need trucks and GI Joes' (which BTW looked like dolls to me) because boys need to grow up to be men.  Gawd........Not like my ex I hope, no one likes those men.

Another 'incident' involved playing with and baking in, an Easy Bake Oven.  Again, geesh, boys aren't supposed to use those.  Well they can use them, the same as an adult male who is not threatened by 'women's chores, can use a real oven.  Try it guys!  The stove has no built in gizmo, like a James Bond movie, where if the man touches the stove, he is zapped, and electrocuted.  No, seriously, he's not.  Dishwater is not kryptonite to a man's species either.

Where's the little boy in this picture?

As a child I loved climbing trees, I rode a boy's blue bike (the only one my parents could find at a household auction) I played in the dirt for hours with trucks.  I had toy cap guns, I played cowboys and rode a wooden, stick horse with a black cloth head and a yellow mane.  I didn't grow up to be a serial killer, an axe- murderer, bank robber nor hate peace.  In fact, I am and have always been a peace loving person.

Doesn't this picture look all too familiar?

If boys can't play tea party, cook in Easy Bake Ovens or feed dolls with a bottle, how in hell are they supposed to grow up to be decent men, dads or partners in any relationships or have respect for all of humanity?  

A few years ago, a dish washing detergent ran commercials showing a man doing dishes and men in America threw a hissy fit.  I guess the 'dish washing elf' does a single man's dishes?  Where in hell is that elf when I need it?  Another ad, ran by a car company, showed women on a balcony watching a guy getting out of a sports car.  The conversation was: "Nice car, I wonder what he's compensating for?"  Sexist?  Yes, but why it is acceptable to run sexist ads when women are the brunt of the joke?  Men don't get pissed then.

I sincerely hope parents are much more enlightened.  But then, I look at violent video games and wonder. 

Divorce diaries

Should have been what many of us women did first, before marriage.

When a woman lives in a small town, with no women's shelters, she is basically on her own.  She has to stay with friends, hope Social Services puts you and your kids in a motel or sleep in her car, if she can even afford a car.  I know, first hand.  I went to Social Services once, the first time I had tried to leave, and this is what one of those workers said to me: "I'm so booked up right now.  Can't you just make up?  For a while?"  Now it's a statistical fact most abused women leave 5 times before staying away, or for good.  Can't imagine why in small towns.  I know those workers hope we all leave their jurisdiction, to save them paperwork.  One woman I met, later on, while working in a city that did have a shelter, fled with her small dog, to be told: "I'm sorry but we cannot let you have your dog."  Bull shit!  There is a loving connection with a pet, what in hell is wrong with agencies anyway?

Getting services is frustrating.

A woman has to go for services if she has no job at the time.  The abuser usually makes sure she has no decent job because he calls where she works, or she is emotionally distraught as to what is going at home, no social support, and isolated that she ends up losing her job. 

My two kids and I stayed with a friend for a while, but her husband was so abusive, that was a trauma by itself.  We stayed there because even though I found a nice apartment, Social Services refused to pay for it because the landlord didn't require a security deposit.  No safe haven because of some effed up rules.  

Then we found a HUD apartment and we had absolutely no furniture because we fled with the clothes on our backs.  But we were happier than in a household full of turmoil.  Social Services offered no help with furniture nor tells you they have a fund for any.

I know many people view women who go for services as lazy, incompetent, shiftless, bad mothers and so on so forth.  Not so.  If you have school aged kids, well you also have to 'look for a job' because Welfare to Work is supposed to help you be self-sufficient. But how is that?  You usually have to get a low paying job, crappy hours, no support especially after a while, for child care, no car and Still have to get food stamps and Medicare because the crappy job pays nothing, so you cannot afford rent and utilities and food.  You know what small towns offer for jobs?  Mostly the "Would you like fries with that?"  Kind of employment.

Over the edge yet?

The times I had called the police when the abuser was acting up, went like this:  once the cop sided with the ex saying: "I understand, my ex wife is a bitch too."  The abuser is not the bitch?  Then another cop tried to talk me out of having him arrested.  Explaining to me the abuser was just distraught and upset.  

Yes, he usually was distraught and upset over nothing.  What's new?  I am a firm believer that a Case Manager should go on Every domestic call simply for the woman to have someone to talk to, and to have moral support.

Like I always say: "Stop domestic violence" is nothing more than the slogan and the cause of the week once a year.

What have YOU done to help an abused woman get someplace safe?  

Foodie break, meatloaf Wellington

Back to the very old cookbook I found, it resembles my Mom's book I grew up with.  

I love meatloaf, and I know in this modern era, we are not supposed to love red meat.  I confess, I do, and many times I use ground turkey, at least for 50% of it, but then, once in a while I just like the total red meat thing (sorry vegans and vegetarians everywhere), but I grew up in a household where my Dad loved meat for meals.

This recipe for Meatloaf Wellington is delicious and we loved it.  Easy to prepare and very elegant looking for a company dinner, or just a Sunday dinner.  You can impress in-laws with your cooking skills because it looks beautiful on the table.  The recipes from this book don't take a long time to prepare, so they are ideal for working people who want something on the table in no time, especially after a day of work.  

Meatloaf Wellington:

1 can (10 1/2 ounces) condensed cream of mushroom or golden mushroom soup

2 pounds of ground beef, or 1 pound beef and 1 pound ground turkey

1/2 cup of fine dry bread crumbs

1/3 cup finely chopped onion

1 egg, slightly beaten

1/3 cup of water

1 teaspoon salt (if desired)

1 package of refrigerated crescent rolls

Mix thoroughly 1/2 cup of soup, beef, bread crumbs, onion, egg and and salt.  Shape firmly into loaf (8 by 4  inches); place in shallow baking pan.  Bake for 1 hour at 375 degrees F.  Spoon off fat.  Separate one package of refrigerated crescent rolls; place crosswise over top and down sides of meatloaf, overlapping slightly.  Bake 15 minutes more.  

Great with a tossed salad, green beans or mashed potatoes.

I hope you enjoy this recipe. 

Bon Appetite! 

Divorce diaries or Phil isn't always right

Dr. Phil and his rescuing of relationships, isn't always right.  Sometimes you just have to ditch the guy, even after 16 years of marriage.

Marriage?  In my case, the term is used lightly, it was more like a living arrangement, no real companionship, no romance once he said 'I do' and marrying a Vietnam vet with PTSD turned out to be a total nightmare.  He wasn't going to change, but he sure tried to change me.  

When your SO tries to change you, in every way, you eventually get the point that maybe you are not meant to be with him after all.  Unfortunately it took me years to work up the courage to realize that and to finally leave.

Some vets with PTSD do not live in a world of reality.  I am sure my ex was suffering from a big dose of sociopath long before I met him, and being in the Army just made him worse.  

When dating, he appeared sweet, but I know now, all the red flags and signs that popped up in dating should have warned me.  I was young and too trusting to see them.

Anyway, this blog will talk about striking out on my own, scared, no real social support, but it happened and I survived it.  No, I wasn't fortunate enough to have money to travel as in Eat, Pray, Love............who in hell does?  Mine was more like Leave, Live, Survive.  I hope this blog helps others with or without a plan.

Why oh why?

I've always liked this cartoon, probably because it just kind of says it all about job dissatisfaction, especially these days.

The thing about getting older is that we have seen many changes over time.  I have to say, in the 21st century, societal changes have not been particularly great, especially the dismantling of the American economy and destruction of the middle class workers.

What I have seen and experienced:  In the 1970's some people were making $9.00 an hour....fast forward to 2013 and the same $9.00 is touted as being wonderful, terrific, and isn't it great?  How in hell this number never changing in 40 years is a great thing, eludes me.

Having insurance that covered everything and still not costing a fortune.  On Facebook I just saw a picture of Ronald Reagan and people lauding his virtues, sayings like: "We sure do miss him."  Those make me puke.  Why?  Because those people don't bother to pay attention, read or worse yet, remember history and the fact Reagan is the reason we have horrible health insurance.

In the 1960's we had to bring in Civil Rights............Not so much because any president wanted to......but a generation of people interested in improving America........stood up and Demanded it.  If anyone these days thought of demanding anything............most worry about breaking a nail or worse yet, breaking a sweat.  Young people with loads of energy, and no civic mindedness, sit on electronic devices saying: "Someone should do something."  So Do It Already!!!!!!!!!

I used to see unions protecting workers, keeping employers from screwing them over and now I see workers running scared......afraid to say shit if they have a mouthful..........scared of losing their tacky little shitty, part time jobs..........they'd rather hang on by their fingernails instead of Really Living.   Scared they will have their jobs taken away....afraid their houses will be taken.afraid of losing their gas sucking cars and trucks............afraid their clothes will be taken.....their birthdays will be taken.......their first born will be taken.........their underwear will be taken.  So protest naked!

Companies used to provide health insurance..........it covered a multitude of things, including medications..........I've seen a government and a society say: "Pot is awful................but over priced prescription narcotics are wonderful."  Where's the logic in this?  Companies made a profit back then, yet paid some workers a decent wage and provided a retirement for some.  OK  I say some because most women didn't get a good wage............but kids did work McDonald's and Did Not have to make a career out of it later on as adults.  I do recall being asked at a job interview: "So how many kids do you have?"  This came on the heels of: "Are you married?"  "Do you have good child care so you can come to work?"   But then my answer was:  "Do you ask male applicants the same questions about child care?  Oh yes, they have the 'little woman' at home to depend on so men don't need to worry about such things."  That did shut them up.  I didn't always get the job, but who wants to work for that employer anyway?

We haven't come so far now either.  Women still do the Same work and get paid less.  Why is that?

Why do you workers put up with a CEO coming to your place of business saying: "No more than 35 (or less) hours, no benefits, you get wage freezes and no time off pay, no retirement."  Yet this Same CEO is making a 6 figure income at Your expense.

I guess I just need to know what in hell happened to a workforce that has decided to roll over, take it up the ass and then kiss the chains of their masters?

I suppose some will say I'm harsh and some will say I'm negative...............but have your opinions.

Foodies; recipes from an old cookbook

These colors, signs of the times, 1960's

I found a great cookbook at a rummage sale and I bought it because my Mom had this book, among many other cookbooks.  I grew up with some really cool recipe books and Mom loved to experiment with recipes.  Some turned out well and were a hit while some............Meh........take em or leave them.

Sounds like fun to me, Bobbie's pad?  Hmmmmmmmmm

Fondue is a Swiss, French and Italian dish.  It became quite popular in 1960 in America............fondue dinner parties sprung up all over the place, in homes and restaurants.  

This is an inexpensive fondue recipe, my husband does not like fondue but I do. (I do..........rhymes)

A little time travel.  Looks like Chelsea Clinton!

*Cheese Fondue*

1/2 cup of dry, white wine (starts out good already)

1 medium clove of garlic, minced (you can open fresh garlic easily by taking your cutting knife and smashing the clove on your chopping block underneath your knife)

4 slices of natural Swiss cheese, torn into pieces

2 tablespoons of flour

1 can (10 3/4 ounces) of Cheddar cheese soup

French or Italian bread cubes

In a saucepan or fondue pot, simmer wine and garlic.  Combine cheese and flour: gradually blend into wine.  Heat until cheese melts; stir now and then.  Blend in soup: heat, stirring until smooth.  Spear bread cubes with a fork, fondue fork or wooden skewer (toothpicks work too) dip cubes into fondue mix.  Makes 2 cups.

* You can also dip bite-size pieces of cooked franks, cocktail wieners, lobster, shrimp, or artichoke.

You can have a 'sip and dip' party.  Invite guests to sip and dip, serve wine, or beer and if you have a fireplace, this is a wonderful dish to serve in front of a crackling fire.

Come on, ya gotta love the hair!

OK  This can burn Real easy too, stir, stir, stir!

License information is fun

Love this list!!!

So the youngest son decided to go for the driver's license.  I can understand his former reluctance...so many damned crazy drivers on the road.  Hell everyday someone pulls in front of us, weaves all over the road and uses their cell phones, illegally in NY I might add, and thus weaves all over the road because of it.

I moved to Indiana for 7 years but didn't renew my driver's license until I got back to NY.  I just didn't want to sit down and take a written test in Indiana.  My NY license was good for the full 7 years so I kept it.  Besides, the license branch in Lafayette, Indiana was a pure nightmare of wait, wait, wait and wait some more.

So I renewed the damned thing when I moved back here.  "Step up to the line for your picture."  Snap....."Do you like this one or want another one?"  Hell, what's the diff?  Another one looks just as bad only from a new angle.  "No, this one is fine." I tell her.

Well with all the spying on American citizens anymore, I guess there's not much the cops, the feds and maybe even my neighbors, can't find out about me.  Oh joy!

I love how the government wants to regulate vagina's but yet Weiner can send pictures of his dick to whomever and now run for NYC mayor.  Why is it men love sharing their wieners on Instagram and the like?  Sausages everywhere.  Well, I got off the track of licenses, didn't I?  But I can't help but wonder why every guy's sausage needs to be in a digital database.  Maybe for dating service sites?  Hell, yeah!  Just what every normal woman wants..........pictures of a sausage fest for guys she wants to get serious about. 

Seriously? 

Is five kids too many?

My biological mom in front, four kids and my Hippie Yippie days

This is about kids, lots of em.  I'm really glad the Duggars came along on TV, if for nothing else, to make me feel better.  I can honestly say I didn't have 19 or 20 of those little bugger Duggars.  Hey, ya get that 'good feeling' where ever you can in this lifetime.

How did I do it?  How did I keep my sanity?  Damned if I know. I guess you can say I raised some free range kids.  I don't recall a whole lot of punishments (although my oldest daughter seems to remember each and every single one of her punishments) but I honestly do not have such a vivid memory as hers.

They all helped, mostly, sometimes, with chores and such.  Speaking of the eldest girl though, I remember she went through a neat freak phase, at 11, again at 19, again at 25 and by 35 I notice it has tapered off a bit.  She used to love cleaning her room, everything in its place, then she would remind me how I needed to crack the whip on the others to clean their rooms.  She found great joy in cleaning the living room and kitchen sometimes too.  She would grab a sponge or dust cloth and shine everything, all the while lecturing us about being pigs that she had to put up with.  I used to laugh and smile and think how the poor other kids were going to be filthy and live in pig sties when they grew up.  I haven't seen any of mine on Hoarders yet, so I guess one person's filth is another person's normal.

I always grew a big vegetable garden and recently my youngest daughter recalled how those fresh vegetables, always tasted so good.  

I wasn't the perfect parent, but guess what, I have met many who were not either.  So as far as being an expert in imperfect parenting, I guess I pretty much was.  Yeah for me!

We didn't have all the video games that so many kids play now, but we did have a kind of Lego logic going on.  I remember my kids talking to Legos, to their favorite dolls and even to toy graders in the dirt.  These days some psychologist would tell me there is something wrong with talking to inanimate objects, but I don't think so.

In the summer, my kids were allowed to be just kids.  No summer camp, no structured junk, just live, use their imaginations and be themselves.  Those were the days.

Now I think about it, maybe I did discipline the kids once in a while.  When my oldest son was in the Army Reserves, he said he was asked by his DI: "Am I being too harsh Kid?"  It was, of course a rhetorical question.  My son told me he replied: "Naw, I have a mom who could put you to shame."  I'm still wondering if that was a good thing or not.  I let it slide since I would never meet that DI in person anyway.  


Happy Mothers Day to one and all!

Where's concern for American casualties?

I get bugged by all the hype in the media and on social sites concerning this 'great gun debate' to the point of nausea.  I suppose it's so easy for the privileged population to sit back and judge, debate and never really get one damned clue to what is going on in America.

When I say 'privileged' I don't mean in terms of money or wealth......I mean just being treated differently, with respect and most of us taking it all for granted.

When the rest of us are treated a certain way, with respect and just being able to do as we like, mostly, we are just fine.  But now, in 2013, usher in the people who are granted even more privilege, the sands shift, now the elite rich want everything we once had access to and suddenly, well we do not like the taste of losing rights and respect.  Pinches, don't it?

Concerning the big gun debate though, many once middle class, start to listen to the lies, the propaganda vomited out by the group called the NRA.  Why?  Well the NRA understands that Americans need to fear someone, something, fear their rights will be removed and guess what? Then Americans will turn on one another.  It takes very little for American paranoia to be whipped up these days, so the NRA understands that to improve gun sales, it has to create fears in people.  How sad the American people are so prone to such lies.  Does the NRA give a damn about my gun rights?  Hell no, it was created to help their rich, gun making friends sell more guns.  Apparently it works.

What bothers me most is this:  The U.S. government is probably the largest arms dealer in the entire world.  They sell guns to any country for money, usually those countries, once armed, turn those expensive weapons on American soldiers.  Did our government think those countries, bands of rebels or just plain international criminal types would show America gratitude for the weapons?  Oh, please!  

The Second line of thinking that bothers me is:  Are Americans so dumb they think all guns will stay legal and stay only in the hands of responsible gun owners?  Please don't try to convince me they do.  Has American education sunk so low?  Has American education failed us so miserably?  By that I mean:  How have people come to be so gullible?  How have Americans lost their power to reason, to use that thing between their ears so much that they will buy anything dished out to them?  Is our stupidity the legacy of just how powerful the corporate selling machine and its bombarding us daily with ads and sales that we are now just indoctrinated with fallacies?  This has to be the saddest state I, or probably anyone, has seen America sink to since our history began.

I saw a news article today about Sarah Palin rallying for 'gun rights.'  This is a woman who stole big money from those who believed in her. through a super PAC, she took her family on vacation on your dime and now has the unmitigated gall to tell any of us what is 'right.'  

The BIG question is this:  Why do you love rich corporations who want to steal every cent you own?  Who wish to leave you in poverty while they laugh at you for being so gullible?  Do you Honestly think that because YOU gave them your Last red cent for their guns, their poisoned food and their ammunition that THEY EARNED it all alone?  Well they've put you out of your jobs and now you show them respect?  Best count the little money you have in your wallet Before answering That question honestly!

If you think you will 'stand up against the government' one day, you better check Iraq, Libya and Afghanistan Before answering that one too.  American troops invaded entire countries, with bigger and more powerful weapons than YOU will Ever own.  Are you this delusional? If so, you are much more far gone in your brains than I once suspected.

We all have to jump in to invade another country, yet we have children dying every day on American soil.  Children suffering from as much PTSD as Any soldier in a war.  WHERE is our concern, where is American help for our own?  So if America is so concerned for rights, so Christian, why are we NOT sending in help to clean up drugs and poverty on our own streets?  Why?  Because Someone of higher privilege is Benefiting from NOT making America better.  People who live in our own midst, people who call themselves Congress and Senate members.  America, get a grip on something I like to call REALITY!

Do I think I will 'get through' to people whose brains are in the trigger of their guns, the emotions in their reptilian bodies or in the barrels of their weapons?  Nope, but I certainly hope they have an ounce of brain left to maybe, just maybe, understand facts not fallacies.  Probably a losing battle, just as lost as any battle those gun carrying people think they could win against the American government.

Why don't YOU look to see just WHO the enemy REALLY is before hating on your neighbor?  You who hate your neighbors are NOT Christian by ANY stretch of imagination either!

About being self-sufficient

With Earth Day and all, I was browsing Facebook sites like: Mother Earth News and many DIY sites.  It's nice to know I have a good friend, Suzanne, who, like me, loves to garden and is pretty good at it.  I have a husband who loves to garden and is quite good at it.  I once lived in a log home on 4 1/2 acres of land and that is where I learned to garden.

We had all those acres of mostly clay.  But I learned to raise chickens, milk goats and rabbits so I had plenty of organic fertilizer.  I also learned when it comes to compost and animal fertilizer, one can never have enough.  But eventually, with the help of raised beds, I turned that clay into very nice soil that would grow nearly anything from 
scratch.

But I think about the younger generation.  They move to the cities for jobs and if the economy ever gets very bad, well, those super markets will run out of food in probably 24 hours.  They can grow rooftop gardens and patio gardens, but I often wonder how many actually do that.  

Growing up, we lived on five acres and quite a bit of that land was a huge garden.  My dad grew every vegetable we ever needed.  Mom never bought vegetables, she canned and froze everything we needed for winter months too.  That little farm was where I learned to drive a standard shift too.  By the time I was twelve, I was driving that tractor down those rows of food and soaking up sunshine.

My Mom told stories of how she would make 21 loaves of bread a week, to feed a bunch of growing kids.  She said that, in those days, if a bride bought bread the rumors flew about: "Poor thing, she cannot cook."  It was essential to know how to sew on a treadle sewing machine, using nothing more than skill and physical labor.  We also used, every Monday, a wringer washing machine, requiring more labor, filling rinse tubs by hand and filling the washer by hand.  Then we would hang it all outdoors on the line.  I feel sorry for the kids who don't grow up with that wash day smell.  I still recall it, a mixture of bleach, laundry soap and sunshine, glorious sunshine.  Nothing feels, or smells, nicer than snuggling into sheets hung on a line, freshness never smelled so good.

I feel sorry for the kids who have never experienced pickling day.  Walking into the house, smelling dill, vinegar and fresh cucumbers. 

Do I think everyone should live like that?  No, our days are much busier, maybe, although there were the same hours in a day then as there is now.  But I do think everyone should know these skills, just in case.  Some skills are invaluable and might make the difference between going hungry and being able to eat.  There isn't anything quite as satisfying as knowing how to feed yourself if you need to know how.

Well, thanks for stopping in again.  Have another cup of coffee and some homemade muffins. 

Sit down have coffee just talkin

Sit down, let me pour you some coffee, let's chat, let's get to know each other.

I really like the picture I posted today.  Back before the age of the 'disposable spouse' when couples didn't split at the slightest thing or setback.  

I grew up in a time when my mom was home after school, when you knew someone was there to ask 'how was your day?'  Now I know in this modern era, in order to just place food on the table, mom probably has to work.  A shame, really, but then it is a shame when being a mom pays no retirement benefits either.  Sux all around.  But, hey, parents do what they can.

The Internet is all buzzing about the Boston Marathon bombing.  Hell, it's gotten so I'm leery to shop the malls anymore.  I do make it a point to not go there during the Christmas rush.  Probably just as well, the mall only brings out every materialistic bone in my body anyway.  Best not to be tempted by all that glitter and glitz.  But, the bombing.  For many years other countries have lived with this kind of thing.  I suppose Americans sat all smug feeling it never happens to us.  I think all that has changed now though.  We now see and feel, how the 'other half lives.'

Americans always felt American middle class would always be safe too,  So much has changed in recent years.  So many things we always felt were the other person's problem.  Well, here those problems are.  At our own door step. 

Well thanks for stopping by.  Here have another cup of coffee before you go. 

Can you believe how much this liquid costs now at Starbucks?  

Just talkin

Posting a story that, I thought was good, what in hell do I know, I ask myself since then. 

 So never knowing what anyone wants to read at this point, I am just going to ramble, to talk, like you are at my table having coffee with me.

I am cheeky enough today to post my funky pictures I created from a cool program on the Internet.  No frills, no catchy famous people.

Recently I visited my brother, whom I hadn't seen in about 27 years.  Long time between visits you could say.  Go ahead, say it. 

 We had a very nice visit and I was chatting often with my niece before the visit.  Now it amazes me when people send "Friend request" on Facebook.  You accept the request, then, pow! They hardly ever talk to you anymore. Conversations with my niece pretty much stopped after the visit.  My perfume, soap, deoderant?   OK

Recently a person whom I grew up with and once was a close friend to, her husband died.  I knew he had been sick and we are 'friends' on FB too. Well no one answered my inquiries about how he was doing, next thing I know he passed away.  OK

I never know what makes people annoyed so if I have offended anyone, I was not aware of it.

Why did my family (brothers and sisters) drift apart in the first place?  Well I got divorced and I imagine those, friends and family, who have good marriages, just steer clear of those divorced people.  I spent my divorced years on my own, except for one friend I made when single.  She helped me a lot, she too was a single mom and so she didn't worry that divorce or singleness might rub off on her I guess.

Sit down, have some coffee

I didn't see 'family' the entire time I was divorced, struggling and living alone, but I don't hold a grudge.  They have lives and were very busy I'm sure.  So along comes FB and if I am not acknowledging some life changes, I guess I have offended though I didn't mean to.  I never know what to say to people in crisis.  Nothing is going to make their crisis go away so I am not always sure what the right words are.  Not a judgement call, simply my observation.  

Just talkin about every day things in life. 

Unpacking the dishes 3

I froze in the middle of my unpacking, still clutching 

the high ball glass in one hand and the packing paper 

in the other. 

His voice was as smooth as glass against silk.  

Like no voice I'd ever heard before. I couldn't believe 

my eyes. 

When I saw his face, I was astonished.This guy looked 

so much like my first love, the guy I'd 

fallen for in college.  The guy I lost my virginity to. 

We never worked out, after graduation he went off to 

a foreign country to help teach and I never heard from 

him again.  

For years I carried a torch for him though.  I never 

really got over him or my broken heart.

"I hope my being shirtless isn't offending you, but I 

figured with the humidity and all and I guess I didn't 

think anyone would be home.  I'm glad you are though, it makes it easier for me to find the unit that needs fixing."

Still staring I did manage to find my voice.

"That's quite alright, I was just daydreaming while unpacking and I didn't hear you come in.  I'm fine.  Let me show you where the unit is.  Follow me please."

Brushing by him, I couldn't help but notice his smell.

He smelled like fresh air, sunshine and the salty water of the beach on a windy day, all rolled into one. His smell was very sensual to me, quite intoxicating, actually. 

As he followed me, I was keenly aware of his presence 

behind me.  

When we got to the cooling unit, I stopped, he was walking fast to keep up with me and he nearly ran into my back. His slight brush behind me from the near collision of our bodies made my skin tingle.  I could feel his breath on the back of my neck. 

Suddenly, it wasn't too hot at all, I felt chills going up my spine.  His smell was stronger now, that smell, it was like a drug and beginning to make me feel heady.

I turned around, looked at him and he seemed to be incredibly calm.  Much calmer than me anyway.  I spoke quickly before he noticed the affect his presence was having on me. 

"Here it is, I hope it's not too far gone."His attention turned to the unit for a moment.

  "I'll do the best I can to get it going for you."

He smiled, flashing big, beautiful, perfect, white teeth 

and even his smile was beginning to make my legs feel 

like rubber.

For a split second, I noticed his gaze slipped to my nipples and I suddenly realized I had no bra on.

I had simply thrown on a halter top and short, shorts 

after my shower because of the sultry heat.

I felt a bit uneasy and flattered at the same time 

because he was noticing my breasts.